FRACTURED COMPUTER DEFINITIONS

"Hard drive"  ------ Trying to climb a steep, muddy hill with 3 flat
                     tires and pulling a trailer load of fertilizer.

"Keyboard" --------- Place to hang your truck keys.

"Window" ----------- Place in the truck to hang your guns.

"Floppy" ----------- When you run out of polygrip.

"Modem" ------------ How you get rid of your dandelions.

"Rom" -------------- Delicious when you mix it with coca-cola.

"Byte" ------------- First word in a kiss-off phrase.

"Reboot" ----------- What you do when the first pair gets covered
                     with barnyard stuff.

"Network" ---------- Activity meant to provide bait for your trot line.

"Mouse" ------------ Fuzzy, soft thing you stuff in your beer bottle
                     in order to get a free case.

"Lan" -------------- To borrow as in, "Hey Delbert! Lan me your truck."

"Cursor" ----------- What some guys do when they are mad at their wife
                     and/or girlfriend.

"Bit" -------------- A wager as in, "I bit you can't spit that
                     watermelon seed across the porch longways."

"Digital Control" -- What your fingers do on the TV remote.

"Packet" ----------- What you do to a suitcase or WAl-Mart bag before a trip.